Happy Little Mouse Year ^_<

Let's look at the happy part after the terrible and annoying story about the spider. Although this little incident actually brought more warmth into my life, but still, it made me feel not so good when think about it.

The memory of me just arriving California was fresh as if it was just happened yesterday. It was hard. I would say the most precious things that I have in this state are that I got to know so many good and truly kind people. One of them, whom I treasure the most is my "4th brother". I am the eldest in my family and never experience the feeling of having a good big brother. He really treats me as his sister and takes care of me a lot. This new year, I got a lot of "ang pao" because of him. He brought me to his family gathering to collect "ang paos". Haha! Thank you so much, Sei Go!

I do not have any of his pictures but I brought his children to Museum of Nature not long ago and we took a few photos. Here are some of the pics:

They are my Sei Go three little sweet hearts. They are truely sweet and always open their welcoming arms to me. We were having really good time visiting the museum.

I spent my New Year's Eve with my co-workers and boss in the restaurant. We had a big feast: Lobster, Bass fish, Sea cucumber, Crab meat soup etc. The boss bought two bottles of Chivas Regal Whisky (aged 12 years). I felt a little embarrass to admit that I become a "better" drinker after I came to America. Last time when I was in Malaysia, I drank wine but do not really know how to differentiate good taste or bad taste. California has good weather and therefore it is a good place to grow almost anything. The grapes here grow well and the wine produced here are actually have high quality and taste good. Now I know how to appreciate not only cocktail but also shots like Whisky and Cognac (Brandy). Erm.. Not a proud thing to show off, at least definitely not a good idea to let my family knows about it :P

Anyway, I did not drink much that night because I have to drive and I hate to drink and drive. The other reason was that my co-workers (especially those Mexican) were showing big response when they saw me pour the liquor into my glass. They made me embarass by saying loudly, "Zoe, you drink??!!" Ok, fine! No more.

Then, gambling! Haha! We played 13 cards and the other side were playing a game sort of like "big and small". I did not really know how to play 13 cards but I have so many masters around me. They helped me to arrange the cards and helped to win money as well. Haha! I then went to Sei Go's relatives' house to collect "ang paos" and enjoyed seeing them playing fire crackers at the neighbourhood. It was a pleasant night to me.

I have a delightful new year this year compare with last year. Although I still could not spend my time with my dearest family, but I am glad that I have enlarged my social circle. I feel thankful to meet with these people who are caring and kind. I will keep my effort to live a better life each day. GAMBATE!!!

Damn Spider

It has been more than a month since my last post. Hmm.. I am getting lazier. It's a brand new year, I should become a better person each day but not lazier. It is 12.17am now, so I should say yesterday was not a good day to me.

I slept at around 3am recently. I do not need to work on Saturday so I could sleep until whenever I want. I woke up on 9.30am though. Later on I realized I was waken by a damn spider.

As usual, I switched on my laptop and checked my mail and talking on the phone with Paik Yin. Suddenly, I felt something crawling inside my left ear. (I could feel as if it is still crawling inside my ear while I recall this. Gosh!) I did not really care but then the feeling was more obvious later on. It was trying to crawl in and out. Ahhh, damn creepy! I then recalled that I saw a small spider on my bed before I slept the night before. I did not care about the spider. I did not even try to get it off my bed. Don't ask me why. I still cannot accept this part of life called, "Stupid".

I started to call friends to ask for help. They asked me to jump and I did. I thought I saw a big black insect flew out. (Later only I found out the "big black insect" was my earphone dropped off.) Then I continue to talk to my friend. Suddenly, it crawled again! I started getting nervous. One of my friends suggested to put some cooking oil inside the ear to let it drop out. I did not do that because I was so scared and it was gross. Then he suggested me to substitute by water. The minute I poured the water inside my ear, I could feel the spider became nervous and crawl wildly! It actually moved deeper into my ear rather than crawl out. It hurts, even until now when I recall. It is gross, creepy and scary! I broke down and cried badly. After awhile, I jumped again and the spider finally dropped out and fall onto the floor. I couldn't stop crying even the spider lying half dead on the floor. I looked at the spider and talking to my housemate, Ivan, on the phone. I did not tell him that the spider has came out at that moment because I could not even think.

After a few seconds, I felt something crawling in my ear, still! I could not control myself anymore. First time in my life, I cried like a baby. I could not stop my tears even while talking with Ivan. I felt so sorry to him because I could heard his worries. He did not think twice but decided to come home straight, even though he was having good time with his mom at Huntington Beach, where was about 30minutes away from my house. He tried to calm me down and said he brought his mom back to help me, since his mom is a nurse. I really need to apologize to him because he came all the way back. And the most important thing is, his mom is going back to Brazil and they were treasuring the time together before she fly home. And I screwed up their good time.

I sat on the floor at the kitchen and could not stop my tears from falling. I could not remember how long I have waited. About 5 minutes before Ivan and his mom arrived, my other housemate came back. He was shock to see me sat there and cried. He tried to calm me down and "dragged" me to clinic (because I insisted to wait for Ivan's mom to help me). Finally they were home!

His mom really like an angel. She cannot speak English. She smiled at me, touched my head and asked me not to cry. Three of them then tried whatever way to make me feel better. I was being treated like a princess. I am always lucky to have so many people treated me so good. His mom actually knew that there should be no more spider or any other insects inside my ear but still, she tried to put a few drops of warm water inside my ear for few times. She was trying to clean my ear, to heal the pain and to make sure there is no creature in there.

She then cooked for all of us. At that moment, I felt like I am home. She might never have the chance to read this blog, but I really would like to express my gratitude to her. She would never know how thankful I feel to her.

I went to work at 5pm. There was a new waiter came to work today and he asked me to give him a ride and I did. It should be a happy thing to do since helping people always good. However I felt so "pek cek" after got him home. It was because I did not ask in detail how far was his house and the most important thing is, I got lost! I got lost because he gave me the wrong direction. I was too stupid nowadays as in trusting people for direction. I got to have faith in myself but not simply trust other people for direction since they always gave me the wrong information. I have been trusting people for direction and got lost for a few times recently. If I follow my own instict and experience, I could have done much better. Another "not so smart" part of my life.

Well, I hope it was all over. Today will be a good day -- I hope, I wish and I pray.

一个人的世界

我常在挣扎着该用什么语言来写，因为我忽然之间发现，我的中文正在以惊人的速度退步中，而我的英文又不见得进步。面对自己的“退化”，真的好吓人哦！想了想，中文好了。

现在的我坐在台北的桃园机场，等待两小时后飞往洛杉矶的班机。我其实真的很享受一个人飞的旅程，那种一个人的感觉，一个人的行李，一个人的等待，一个人的思考，彻彻底底地、完完全全的一个人，Hmm……或许有点让人难以理解，但是对我来说真的是个享受。漫长的等待让我学会了享受等待，好像这时候的思绪特别清晰。虽然身在文明的国际机场，但是却有种与世隔绝的心情，隔离了和外界的联络，隔绝了和任何人的交际，完全就是自己悠闲的时间，做着自己平时总是给自己找借口说没有时间做的事。所以四个小时的等待时间在我眼里已不算什么，反而是个BONUS！让自己的思绪沉淀的BONUS。

最近的我深深的爱上了戴佩妮的“一个人的行李”，歌词里的意境，我可以深深的体会。

心情好or心情坏
有什么好假装
反正天若真的塌下来
我自己扛

天气好or天气坏
有什么好紧张
反正下一秒钟的我
开始 开始流浪

我要一个人去东京铁塔看夜景
我要一个人去威尼斯看电影
我要一个人去阳明山上看海芋 拍偶像剧

我要一个人去纽约纯粹看雪景
我要一个人去巴黎喝咖啡写信
我要一个人的旅行
一个人 透透气

向右转or向左拐
有什么不一样
反正每一条未知的路
都有未来

我和谁在谈恋爱
有什么大惊小怪
反正下一秒钟的我
早已 早已离开

我要一个人在希腊梦见苏格拉底
我要一个人的通宵看完鲁迅的背影
我要一个人呆呆的在浴缸里 思考阮玲玉 阮玲玉

我要一个人的北京探望孟姜女
我要一个人的书局和志摩谈情
我要一个人的旅行 一个人彻底～

心情好or心情坏
有什么好假装
一个人的旅行 一个人的行李
一个人的旅行 一个人的好奇
一个人的旅行 一个人没有你




两个星期的时间，真的太仓促了，记忆中仿佛只是前几天的事而已。还记得在同样的台北桃园机场等待转机，只是当时的目的地是我的家园。好不容易终于由遥远的美国抵达心系的家园，当飞机窜出重重云层，我看见马来西亚的大地的那一刹那，嘴角掩不住的笑容，我想是灿烂的。我脚步轻快的像只雀儿步出飞机，蹦蹦跳跳走到行李提取处等待我的行李，嘴角还是深深地牵着笑容。当我终于穿过重重关卡来到抵达处的大堂时，看见好多人拿着牌子伸长颈子等待。我看不见熟悉的身影，便到附近的商店，用十令吉换了些硬币打电话。电话通了，爸爸接了电话说他们已经到了，不过没看见我。我匆匆挂了电话，脚步连跑带飞地奔回抵步大堂。远远就看见爸爸身穿黄色的衣服回头告诉妈妈看见了我，下一刻，我就看见小弟以一百米的速度向我跑来，我们紧紧抱住了……然后轮流抱抱爸爸、妈妈和弟弟。我看见白发苍苍的老爸眼眶都红了，妈妈更是喜极而泣。那一刻的喜悦，直到此时此刻我还能深深感受到。而今天我又让他们的眼眶红了，只是不像上一次的喜悦，而是不舍。对不起了我最爱的爸爸妈妈，总是制造让你们流泪的场面。

然后是一次又一次让人感动的洗尘聚会。我亲爱的朋友们，你们的热情让我感动。遗憾的是我没有更多的时间和大家多多相聚，不过来日方长，总有再会面的时候。至于一些没能相见的朋友，我们相约在不久的未来吧。

我是幸运的，一直都是。宽阔的天空、不一样的生活体验、环绕着我最真挚并无价的亲情与友情、暂时适当性缺席的爱情……我想，我是幸福的。

今天有人告诉我，我的眼里只看见一棵我自以为是的擎天古木，就想可以是檀香好木，殊不知前头却有一大片森林，可以逐棵逐棵挑选。我记住了。接下来我有什么打算？嗯，我希望待会儿在机上可以好好睡觉，然后到了洛杉矶有力气提重重的行李。回家后可以继续再睡！哈哈！

很多时候，人生其实就是这么回事儿。很多人食不知味，夜不能寝。所以我说，吃得下，睡得着，就是幸福。呵呵！